Shaddowlight
by senza volto
Summary: Sakura Haruno has had a perfect relationship with a perfect man for half a year. Anyway, she told herself. Until her perfect dream bubble burst. Now that she has to reorient herself, she also opens up other paths that she has so far successfully ignored. But as is the case in life, Sakura has to finish with her past so that over time she can accept and accept feelings for another m
1. I belive

_I had always believed in true love._

 _Especially in having found it in a boy, who was called Sasuke Uchiha. Of course, not everybody was happy about my decision to be in a relationship with him._

 _My parents thought he was an arrogant asshole, who only wants to strip off my clothes. Some girls, who went to my school, wanted what I had accomplished to build with him._

 _And Ino?_

 _She annoyed me with her conspiracy theories._

 _Yes, I had closed my eyes before the facts and called her, with the knowledge about how she used to dig him as well, a liar. Sasuke had, in my opinion, his reasons to treat me like that, or to not react in a probably desirable way in some situations._

 _But at some point everyone wakes up. Even the naivest person the world had ever seen._

 _Yes, even me, Sakura Haruno, I have someday been able to open my eyes for the gruesome reality._

It was one of these moments that didn't feel real. For the first instant it felt for me like a damn bad dream.

If I recall that day properly, I had even been giggling, because I had sworn myself to be a fool. I thought it was only a nightmare, something I had put together because of the past days.

Chuntering, because I felt guilty, I forced myself to part with the soft duvet and abstractedly moved a bit towards the middle of the bed. "Sasuke darling, you won't believe what kind of crap I dreamt together again!" all four stretched out, again giggling, and rubbing the sleep out of my eyes. I didn't expect any answer, because Sasuke had always been a very silent person.

It was one of these features that had made me adore him in the earliest schooldays already. He had always been so mysterious and me far too eager for knowledge and curious. After all, I had always been very sociable and loved to solve riddles. And a Sasuke Uchiha, as a matter of course, was just the biggest and best riddle that fascinated me, even as I was able to have a little look behind the facade.

"I dreamt that you go away again, without saying goodbye," I whispered and irritatedly rubbed the tears off the corners of my eyes even only seconds after that. I didn't want to annoy him with my emotional releases so early in the morning already and was satisfied with turning towards him to be able to look into his eyes.

But he wasn't there.

Could that be? Hadn't it been a dream after all? He had left just like that? Again?

The tears I had managed to oppress for a few seconds ran down my cheeks with a lightness to them, thanks to my emotional character. Sad and with a strange lump in my throat, which made breathing in a painful kind of way difficult for me, I scanned the bed anew, because I thought I was still too caught up inside my dream and for that show myself those very poor pictures. But to my regret there were no Fata Morganas.

 _Scumbag! He has promised me to never do that again!_

Crying I rolled to and fro, fumbled around with the curtain out of anger and pulled myself out of the bed in one movement. But before I stormed out the door just like that, I noticed something off just in time. Self-understandingly I looked down on me and felt my cheeks getting hotter.

I was naked.

We had slept with each other yesterday.

I was in his room and for that automatically at his home.

 _Maybe he just went for a shower?_

With a swallow and still red cheeks by shame, I browsed inside my little handbag to find a new slip and out of habit walked over to his closet and shortly after that got into a white shirt. Then I shyly went through the hallways of the Uchiha property and determinedly towards the bathroom, knocking on the door.

That bathroom, as much as Sasuke had told me, was used only by him and his older brother, who however was on the road a lot. Honestly, I wouldn't have believed his existence, if I hadn't seen various pictures inside the house and even on Sasuke's phone. But I didn't want to leave a bad impression towards him, if I would ever meet him, or put him on the spot with standing in the bathroom half-naked, while he freshens up.

When I didn't hear anyone answer, I just opened the door, locked it behind me and prepared the room angry again, put a towel on the white tiled floor and got under the shower with red cheeks.

 _Are you serious, Uchiha?_

With tears, this time caused by anger towards him, I turned on the shower and put it on the coldest level, so I could cool down in the truest sense of the word. After all I wanted to avoid a tantrum inside the shower in the house of my boyfriend at any cost. I inhaled the air sharply and chewed on my lips desperately to avoid a loud cry and then put Sasuke's shower gel and shampoo on myself, because I didn't dare to take any of Itachi's stuff.

When I was ready, I toweled myself off, got other things done you do in the bathroom and went back into his room to get dressed and go downstairs to say goodbye to his parents.

Meanwhile many different thoughts were bothering me.

Maybe he is sitting at the breakfast table already and I really just make a fool of myself. But if not, _he should brace himself. I didn't do anything wrong after all, did I? Right, even if, he can just finally tell me what's his freaking problem. I've had enough cold-shoulder. Or only getting paid attention to whenever it suits his plans._

I didn't even notice anymore, how my hands became fists, before I, as I saw his mother, forced myself to calm down and not shout at her just like that. Because after all it wasn't her fault, that her son behaved the way he did.

"Oh hello, Sakura. Do you want to have breakfast with us? I made scrambled eggs with bacon, pancakes and blueberry muffins." Even when my mouth already watered with the description, I didn't want to park myself on them like an insect and eat up all their food in the worst case scenario.

Apart from that, I just felt displaced, when Sasuke wasn't near me. As if to claim something that I actually didn't deserve.

"Is Sasuke still here?" I asked absent-minded and looked around insecurely and could have hit myself because of the thought about Ino making fun of me, if she knew how I was acting right now. Because it wasn't anywhere near typical for me to be shy and introverted.

Mikoto frowned a bit, but then smiled at me friendly, before she put the bowl of scrambled eggs on the breakfast table. _Delicious, Nutella, fresh strawberries, sparkling wine, croissants and fresh buns from the bakery!_

"No, he didn't have that much of an appetite and wanted to go for a run. But he didn't want to wake you and so he went off just like that."

 _Don't you believe it._

Again I felt anger raising inside me and noticed the lava raising in my body to keep boiling up slowly but surely. Absent-mindedly I clenched my fists and fixed on a spot in the hallway.

 _He really did it again! Although he promised me. That little scumbag! How dare he?_

"Sakura?" Mikoto asked worriedly and even touched my upper arm to calm me down with petting movements. "Did you two have your first relationship fight then? Do you want to tell me about what happened?"

Desperately I was chewing on my lips and breathed in and out with closed eyes to calm down, but I almost laughed. First relationship fight sounded like a damn bad joke and that's exactly what I felt like. Played games with and humiliated.

"That's very nice of you, Mikoto!" crying again now, I drew back from her and got ready to go, "But I don't feel like it. I just want to be alone." T _o cry, to ignore him to death for another couple of weeks._

I looked to the ground, so she wouldn't have to see my red cheeks from all the anger and the tears in my eyes, and unable to cope, scraped my feet along the floor.

"What's happening?" I suddenly heard Fugaku ask from behind me and his wife sighed theatrically. "I guess our son did something that hurt her." Again I felt her seeking body contact to me and the serious man, who called himself Sasuke's father, groaned quietly.

"First relationship crisis?"

It would have almost been funny, if this was the only bad thing about our relationship. Though, not only since today, as everyone was thinking.

"Yes. But she doesn't want to say, what it's about, and wants to go home."

"So let her." he simply gave and pushed past us. "It's their relationship and they have to talk about it, not us," he said unimpressed, when Mikoto flared at him angrily, and meanwhile poured himself a coffee.

"But she doesn't feel well."

"She won't feel better, if she has breakfast with us, darling," he sighed quietly and just at that moment said Sasuke Uchiha opened the door and that only to first unimpressed and then angrily get an idea of the situation presenting itself to him.

"What did you tell them?" his voice sounded so toneless, as if he would ask about why the sky was blue, but in his words there was so much anger and behind them a hidden threat that made me wince. But eventually my own angriness won.

I folded my arms in front of my body. "I could ask you something as well. For example, why you disappeared again just like that, without letting me know."

"You were sleeping and I don't owe you any commitment."

 _If, to that point in time, as Sasuke found his way back to his property by any stupid coincident, there had been anything like self-effacement from my side, I now exploded completely. Now I didn't even care a bit about the presence of his parents._

"Not owing me any commitment?" I burst out laughing hoarsely and braced my hands on my hips. "We're a couple, Uchiha! Of course you owe me telling me, when you, after six months of our relationship, piss off just like that, only because you happen to not be up for me anymore, or only getting in touch, whenever you happen to want that. Not to forget that I told you more than once how much it hurts me."

"You make it pretty easy for yourself right now," he simply answered and braced himself on the wall next to me, while his parents were watching the scenery wordlessly. "Easy?" I fired sharply and he smirked at me so arrogantly, that I really wanted to slap him in that moment.

"Yeah, easy. You like to see yourself as the poor victim, how we could see in elementary so perfectly. You got bullied, because you knew it all better, you let it all happen to yourself and you didn't give a damn about your appearance, but at least the others were to blame," I only heard it as if being numb, as Mikoto grasped for air in shock. "But you know what? It's pretty pathetic and not really grown-up, placing conditions, but never acting after them yourself."

Without really intending to, I boxed his shoulder so roughly he rubbed over the spot with a moan. "In contrast to you I stick to our bargain: you hang out with your friends more often than with me and I don't lose a word on it. I leave you in peace, whenever you study for your tests and don't text you every day as well to 'interrogate' you. But I'm sorry that I'm interested in the person I have a relationship with!" I shot at him. My speech didn't even get to him, which exasperated me even more.

"Why did you even come back again?" I asked with tears in my eyes, "If I'm nothing more to you than a little pastime. A person you can just text whenever you feel like it?"

"I forgot my bottle of water."

"Good that you give a crap about my wishes like that, but threw something so obnoxious into my face anyway." I gave just as toneless, before I walked past him, without wasting another look on him, and pushed against him on purpose. He just snorted and now only fought with his mother, because she dared to be on my side. I shook my head in despair and unhappily, before I looked back for a last time. Fugaku was now leaning against the door frame, just at the spot, where I had been standing only minutes ago, and watched the fight between the two quietly, nodding at me friendly, as I was just about to open the door to go.

Jut in that moment I ran into _him_. Into Sasuke Uchiha's older brother, who looked down at me wordlessly.

His eyes were black. Just like Sasuke's, only much darker. Apart from that they had nothing in common with his brother's ones. Because while Sasuke's eyes had always shown something cold and aggressive, Itachi's eyes had something quiet, calm, but also knowing in them. As if there was nothing in the world that could upset him, or anything he couldn't explain logically. With a closer look I even noticed a friendly, good-natured, soft spark inside them and wondered about how he could be related to Sasuke.

"The entire block of houses heard your fight," I cringed and got out of his way with shiny red cheeks, but it couldn't be avoided that we touched softly for a bit. That I could scent his perfume. An interesting mixture of pomegranate and forest honey. Without realizing it I breathed in his scent and felt myself calming down right away just by his odor. But it could have as well been his deep, soft and calm voice, which made little chills shoot through my body.

"Hello, my son," in fact, _in fact_ Fugaku was smiling by the sight of his oldest son, even when only for a short moment. "Are you swinging by again? How was summer camp?"

"The kids I looked after were all very well-behaved and nice, as long as you knew how to handle them," he answered placidly and walked directly towards his little brother, who stared at him with so much anger, as if he had stolen something very valuable from him with his absence.

"Is that the girlfriend you told me about?" Itachi asked unimpressed and looked into my eyes for a moment. "You never mentioned that she's so pretty." I couldn't help myself but smile. Sasuke hadn't ever called me pretty.

"And again you screwed up."

"How is that any of your business?" Sasuke fired, "It's not like she's your girlfriend and you're hardly ever here anyway, only, when it's about bragging about all the great things you achieved." The older one smiled wordlessly, before he turned to me again. "I would suggest you go, Sakura. But not, because I don't want you in my house. Not even, because Sasuke doesn't want it, but for your own good. My brother is a very exhausting person, you know? Whenever he has a problem, he likes to blame it on others. It makes it easier for him. Because he's never been someone, who cares for other people's feelings. But I give it to him, that he's gotten better with that during the past few years."

"Uhm," I gave confusedly and as well not particularly intelligently, which made Itachi smile. But eventually I nodded with a swallow and a dry throat, before I now finally went outside and closed the door behind me. The last thing I heard was most likely Sasuke grabbing the vase on the sideboard to throw it against the wall angrily and screaming.


	2. I cold

**_I had always believed in true love. As a child I had adored the princess movies and only for the happy ends wanted to be like them._**

 _Every older person in my life had always been amused by my childish ways of thinking and left me in my trustful thoughts and wishes. After all, my stance would change during the years and hopefully to realistic degrees._

 _But my naive stance about love and much more than that stayed. Even when I was actually in a relationship with Sasuke and the first negative things a serious commitment with someone contained showed their faces._

 _I would make it. With him. After all, my parents, grandparents and many more before me had made it as well._

 _And I was so credulous to think that it would be the same with Sasuke. In my nearly stupid naivety I had, until the fight, which had destroyed me and my view of the world, called him my soulmate._

 _Now that my illusion had completely come apart at the seams, the world felt cold and evil. The grown-ups' amusement, who had gotten rid of me in a friendly way and had left me in my naive imagination, now mocked me._

 _It was one of these moments, where you feel just miserable. As if your body was affected by a horrible decease and wanted to eat you up from the inside._

If I recall that day right, I had talked bad about everything I had achieved in my short, young life. I thought, because I had seen Sasuke's true face only now, couldn't sugarcoat all the things he had done to me anymore, that I had done it all wrong in my life.

I had dedicated my life to love. I wanted to be like the princesses in the movies, who were beautiful and helpful, because someday they became happy with a person, who loved them the way they were. But what did I get from all the naivety and the kind-heartedness?

Sasuke made me feel bad.  
Humiliated.  
Exposed.  
No matter in which situation.

When I properly think about it, I had some kind of feeling of distance even when we were sleeping with each other, although sex is supposed to be the most intimate and most beautiful thing between two people.

Whenever he kissed me, it felt as if it was a part of his purview, or to mark what is his in front of the other students, which he however was only interested in, when we were in public.

Apart from that he texted me very rarely. Mostly to the most unusual times. Before Sasuke and I had had that fight, I had found those spontaneous calls exciting. Towards my friends I described it as something special, when he called me in the middle of the night to tell me that his parents weren't home. Or that he would sometimes climb on my balcony at night, like in those tearjerkers I loved so much, and we would make out for a bit, before after a while he would tell me, that he had to take care of other things again, but had wanted to see me.

I had loved it when he took me for a ride on his motorbike, or when we were running through the closest forest in the rain. It were those situations that made me believe our relationship was real. It were those moments that warned me to have patience, because I always held on to those memories.

But now that he had thrown my past in my face and now had told me for the first time that he didn't give a crap about how I felt or what I wanted, I suddenly realized how much he had used me.

I felt miserable.

"Sweetie?"

Without actually noticing anything of my surroundings, I looked up, directly into the faces of my best friends. With that I put my hand unnoticed onto my cheek and numbly realized that it was wet. I was crying. I sharply inhaled some air and braced myself on the table weakly. The incident not even two hours ago took its toll in its own way. In a very exhausting, tiring and agonizing way that seemed to take the air to breathe away from me.

Hinata, who was sitting next to me, touched my back, while Tenten held my hand. Temari and Ino were sitting opposite to me, worrying, while the second one even snapped and fidgeted around with her fingers in front of my face.

We actually hadn't planned to meet up today. Actually I didn't even want to see anyone, but Ino had just called me, like she often does, to tell me about the great new dress she had found in a shop window and about the recent guy that had run into her. But she had already noticed with the sound of my voice, how bad I was feeling, and instantly wanted to know, where I was. Well. And because I had been walking towards the ice cream parlor without noticing, she demanded to wait for her, and before I knew it, she had called an emergency meeting.

"Hm?" my voice sounded horrible. As if it was only programmed to talk, but nothing else.

"What did that wanker Sasuke do again?"

Temari, who only just now seemed to realize who it was about, put her hand to her forehead and mumbled something like "that one again, who's even surprised!"

I sighed quietly and wiped the tears off the corners of my eyes numbly. "He walked out on me. We slept with each other again after weeks and again he ran away." Crying, I hit the table and wouldn't even have reacted to the other guests' looks, if there even were any. But I only laid down my head on the table.

"Oh no!" Ino gave sharply and ironically and built up in front of me. "Really? Sakura, what did I tell you not long ago?"

"That he won't change," I rattled monotone and more then clearly noticed the bad looks glued to my best friend.

"And now? What you gonna do?" Tenten said, after which my best friend started laughing. "What she always does, honey. Ignore him for a while, shout at him, then he will sweet-talk to her, then they'll shag around and then the whole thing repeats itself. Or what do you say, Sakura?"

 _You can shove that bitchy, arrogant slipslop up somewhere, Yamataka! After all you're always the one having a thing with another guy every week and always cry about it!_ I looked her in the eyes angrily and tried to scrape together the rest of my control to avoid yelling down the little ice cream parlor.

"I rather thought of breaking up with him."

No one seemed to have expected that. That emerged very clearly in the shocked silence.

Temari was the first one to calm down and smirkingly nipped at her ice coffee. "Good, that you realized it, too. I never liked that brown-noser on legs. Even alone his egoistic vibes that gave me the urge to puke every time I met him. And I mean directly onto his feet." Hinata giggled quietly and concentrated on her banana chocolate ice cream. "Yeah, he's a very complicated, strong-willed person. Even when I always had the feeling that he has some problem. Something that kept him from being consistent with himself and I think that's the real reason why he acts so rejectingly."

"So you're on Sasuke's side?" Ino nagged bitchily, while I was just starring at my fingers overstrained. This situation caused nothing more than discomfort inside me.

When I recall the days Sasuke and I had spent in the past, I felt like I had been living a lie the whole time. A lie I now grieved for.  
With a moan I covered my eyes with my hands, because it hurt to think about him and all the tenderness I had believed to be worth equally for both of us, and again noticed tears wanting to drop out of the corners of my eyes.

Sasuke had always been like a riddle wrapped up in an enigma. A character trait that had made every girl, so me as well, swoon over him and want to have him. But I had woken up now.

Sasuke Uchiha had a hidden heart out of gold. He also wasn't the type for romance or just not the type of person to show his affection often. It had been wishful thinking I had been chasing and loving the whole time.

"Ino, calm down," I forced myself to smile agonizedly and looked deeply into her eyes.

 _Sasuke, you little asshole! Are you happy now? Oh well, it doesn't matter of course._ With tears that had something to do with my raising anger this time, I clenched my fists without noticing and angrily stared at a spot, which didn't have to show any human characteristics for itself. My little comfortable ice cream parlor I associated with so many great memories, and I didn't want to dishonor it with my screeching and crying.

"Hinata is right. In a way."

 _All these weird moments I had tried to make all right, with cuddling, caresses, or just with my babbling and jokes. I only wanted you to forget about your worries. But apparently I'm not the right person for you. Perhaps not ever for anyone._

I started laughing tearily, as I wiped off the hot tears and pulled out of the loving embrace of my friend. "There's something going on with him. And if he hadn't treated me like crap, I would have done everything to help him solve it and become happy." I slowly stood up, without paying attention to the pitiful look of Adrian, the owner of the parlor, or to the many types of ice cream he had.

"Sakura, what the hell are you doing?" Ino nagged at me and pushed herself out of the chair as well, probably to go for my throat. "Ino, I don't feel like… talking. Or bitching. I just want to be on my own, you know?" I forced myself to smile and walked towards the exit and towards home with shaking legs. _With barricading myself in my room and being annoyed by my parents, who will react the same way as Ino did. But I only wanted to be left in damn peace._  
"Should I swing by his house maybe?" Temari gave. Her voice got deeper with it like always, when she got angry. "Or even better, all of us? So I can tread down his ugly face? Then he would look just as crappy as he is!"

I shook my head weakly. "No, Temari. That's not necessary. I think Mikoto and his older brother will take care of that. After all we played them a nice scene."

"Shit!" Tenten said shocked, while Ino was giggling along quietly. "You did good, honey." I sighed theatrically and now finally opened the door to go through it. "Do you want any of us to come by later?" Tenten gave. I froze. "No," I shivered, thanks to my tears, and looked into her eyes one last time.

"No, Tenten. I'm better off alone today."

That day I was in a hurry to get to the bus. I ran to the next best stop and didn't even notice the strange looks I got. I was far too busy waiting for my line, looking crestfallen. When I arrived at home and locked myself in my room wordlessly, I let myself fall onto my bed.

I cried myself to sleep and thought about what would come the next day.

|.|.|

"So, we'll start this class now with the easiest things: the basic knowledge about the subject we will talk about the entire time more than enough, and the briefing about what will expect you, Ladys and Gentlemen, in this class. And yes, you heard right, I will call you by your last names in this class." Mister Sarutobi smiled friendly into the round and seemed pleased about even Ino Yamataka actually being interested in a class and not just painting her nails annoyed.

But I was just staring at my notebook I had put on the table mechanically, with teary eyes, and scratched together all of my self-composure to not run out of the class crying, or break down in front of the whole class. Because he was sitting next to me.

 _I want out!_ Desperately, because even only his presence hurt me so much, that I wanted to throw up, I tightened my grab on my pen and my alas of the nose moved outwards angrily, as I noticed his stabbing look that seemed to drill through me.

 _Sasuke and I. Together walking across the schoolyard. His fangirls, who pay me envious looks, luckily, though, let me be.  
Me myself, I grin like a Cheshire cat. Back then I felt like Bella of that shitty Twilight movie.  
The archangel had fallen in love with Cinderella. That had been my own interpretation of it back then.  
But I didn't feel inferior. Because I had felt like a princess, as dumb as I was back then.  
A princess, who would hopefully soon grow and blossom by her love._

 _His gaze almost strangled me. As if he would blame me for everything that had gone wrong during the weekend. As if I was a parasite that destroyed everything coming in its way. I groaned quietly and clenched the pen I held in my hand tighter._

"First of all: this is not a class of memorizing. Not even the oral grade is so important for you. No, in this class you should rather concentrate on the questions about what seems most important to yourself as a single person. You will get to know yourselves. Make experiences and probably even go to your limits." he made a short dramatic pause, before he continued talking, "What should be most important to you in this class, are the internships and the intensive talks with the career advisers. After all, we want to look into the question, what you will do after your graduation, which will be in less than half a year. Will you start an apprenticeship? Make your first work experiences abroad, or will you go to college? And if you go to college, what will be your main focus and what kind of studies will you prefer?"

Mister Sarutobi walked through the classroom with slow and relaxed steps, which was typical for him, before he turned back to the blackboard and wrote something on it with his old-fashioned, ornamental handwriting, which students of my generation could hardly even read. "For this is the first lesson and I don't want to plant fears for the future into your heads already, or exhaust you too much, this lesson will be about a simple and creative question: what is your dream job? And no, Ino, that's not an invite for you to enthuse about boys. You won't be able to anyway, because we will discuss with the class what would fit. I'm now even bold enough to spontaneously call someone. Karin, what is your wish for your future job?"

Everyone but me and Sasuke looked at the red-haired wearer of glasses, which seemed more than indifferent to the attention of the class on her. "To be honest, I don't have an exact vision of it yet." she began slowly and Sarutobi made himself comfortable on the teacher's chair behind his desk.

"You won't be the last person I will ask this question, Karin." he answered plainly, while I tried not to jump to the roof because of Sasuke. He resented me that his mother had taken sides with me on saturday and that he had gotten a smacked bottom by his brother, I could feel that very clearly.

 _You little egoistic asshole! How is it my fault that you act like a piece of crap that even your family can't sugarcoat anymore? Should I still have let myself be walked all over? Probably. But not with me, Assoule! Not anymore. I'm not your little marionette you can move the way you like!_ Sullenly I closed my eyes and played with the seam of my Harry Potter shirt to get my hands under control. Otherwise I would have hit him and he would only benefit from it. I couldn't have that. His eyes were still on me, provocative, so his message would really get to me.

Get out of here! He seemed to shout at me in the inside. But I didn't let him get me down. He had tried in the breaks already to make me run away with his dark looks.

That was typical Sasuke. A typical characteristic of him, which I had already noticed, when I had thrown myself at him. But usually he had always been trying to make an indifferent face and to ignore every person, who wasn't worth being paid attention to in his opinion.

This cold, unapproachable act was the reason for every girl, me included, wanting to date him. For outsiders incomprehensible, but I still understood it: the nature he showed on the outside didn't leave so much room for speculations. Rumors like him being shy, or letting only special people near himself. that he had a hard shell, but was soft in the inside.

And nobody will.

"Do you have any idea which branch of profession you want to go in?" Sarutobi asked further and I missed most of Karin's answer. Even when it was only a single word.

I inhaled the air quietly and hissing, as Sasuke slowly bent towards me. After a short time I could even feel his lips at my earlobe and the breath grazing my neck.

His unmistakable aftershave. His striking facial features, oh God, did that fucker shave this morning? I was more than mad at him. Still. The urge to shout him down in front of the whole class, that I thought he was the biggest, most egoistic asshole on earth, was still existing.

And yet, yet I couldn't change anything about the fact that I blushed and my heart beating against my ribcage dangerously fast and loud. It had been only two days and one night, since we had last slept with each other. We had shared something that couldn't have been more intimate. I had felt so… happy and secure. It had been so nice to lie in his arms and…

 _Why am I not enough for you? What did I do wrong that makes you treat me like this?_ The tears I had spilled enough of during the entire weekend, moved their way out of the corners of my eyes again. Desperately I stared at Ino, who noticed my gaze and slowly looked in my direction and killed Sasuke with her eyes.

 _Whatever he says now, Haruno!_ I swallowed to get rid of the dry feeling in my throat and stopped breathing. _Whatever he will do now. Don't respond to it!_

"Can't you just get out of my life? The way you ran out of my house the other day? I can't bear you ugly gum, without wanting to throw up!" he spoke so quietly, only I could hear it. But I had the feeling everyone in the room could hear my heart shattering into thousand pieces and transforming slowly and sticky like poison into mud.

 _It was just too much for me that day. The fact that he treated me this way… that it had been all right not even two days ago… that I still loved him, because it's not possible to just switch off my feelings for him from one day to another._

 _And the mental rope that was my self-composure and was ripped in half with one pull._

 _I only felt the blood rushing in my ears and making me lose my mind. It was like two days ago at the Uchihan property. Only much worse. More intensive. The anger in my stomach had tightened and was so sensitive that it could explode any second._

"I could ask you for the same thing. But let me tell you, that I won't play you spoiled and arrogant asshole in your hands anymore. The world doesn't spin around you, Uchiha! Remember that!" I hissed back and was just about to kick his shin with my foot, but luckily Mister Sarutobi intervened.

"Is there a problem between you two? Perhaps I can help you with it," he said friendly, but there was a spark in his eyes that showed me he knew our discussion wasn't school-related.

 _Yes. This guy next to me is an egoistic asshole!_ I clearly noticed the looks resting on us now and groaned inside. Because now everyone know there was something wrong between us, that we had had a fight. The students would love it and be too eager to jump at the lastest gossip.

 _Sasuke Uchiha und Sakura Haruno, the dream couple of school, have broken up!_

Throwing up in the inside, I prepared for Lee, a slightly squirrelly and sometimes out of it boy, hitting on me again. A fact on the one hand flattering, on the other hand also uncomfortable, because he was not even close to being my type and I didn't like to reject people. Especially when it's such a nice boy, who had to bear the same fate of bullying.

Then again, now the fangirls would throw themselves at him again and throw derisive and envious comments in my face, while I even believed a hand full of girls pumping me for Information for the school magazine. But I didn't feel like either the one, nor the other. I just want my damn peace!

But seemingly the students' sensationalism and my ex boyfriend's search for attention were more important than the well-being of a single person. My person. Up yours!

As I always do, I nervously chewed on my lips and tried to ignore and suppress the upcoming tears in the corners of my eyes. I cursed myself in the inside with it, because I couldn't stand my own emotional nature. And I was emotional and so I seemed to react the same with fear as I did with anger and grief: with tears. I really hated that there was this button inside me, which could turn itself on very quickly.

"Yes, I really have a problem," I whimpered quietly, when I had finally managed to swallow the lump in my throat. Stressed out I wiped my wet hands on my jeans and noticed Ino's surprised and shocked and Sasuke's deadly look being glued to me. For a moment I even thought my best friend would stand up squeakingly and say something embarrassing, happy about me rowing him in front of the whole class and the further principal. But to be honest, I was too exhausted for a war of the roses.

I sighed desperately and blew the stray strand of hair off my wide forehead. "Sasuke is distracting me from class with staring at me the whole time. Besides, I feel a bit dizzy. May I get some fresh air?" Sasuke growled quietly and now seemed to be about to attack me. It clearly annoyed him to get attention in this negative way. Mister Sarutobi looked at me worriedly. "You may also go home, if you want," he skillfully ignored my neighbor. With a swallow I made myself small and played with a strand of hair. "Might be better that way."

Desperately and now really with a slight feeling of dizziness that spread out inside me, I stood up with shaking legs and walked towards the exit. The last thing I noticed was Naruto offering Sasuke to sit with him and that Mister Sarutobi would look after me, but first I should get some fresh air. But I wasn't interested in either the one, or the other.

|.|.|

 _It was frightening how fast and yet agonizingly slow time could pass by. How daily life could make you think of something else than your personal luggage and still remind you of it constantly._

 _Three month had passed._

 _There had changed so much between me and Sasuke and yet nothing at all: we didn't talk since the incident in the classroom. He didn't call or text me anymore and the hysteria over our break-up had disappeared as fast as it had appeared. Surprisingly the fangirls left me alone, because they seemed to have still left a spark of humanity in them and when the bimbo from the school magazine tried to pump me for information, she was upbraided by her friend, as she realized what topic she wanted to approach._

 _Apart from that I concentrated only on my school activities, worked even harder regarding any deadlines, swotted every afternoon for tests, or repeated the subject matter of the past lessons out of sheer desperation. In my spare time I exclusively took care of my friends, who all in all had the same problem as I did: love and boys._

 _Ino had been dating two different guys during the following months, who after all had turned out to be only short flirts and now she had the third one coming. Temari was about to fall for Shikamaru, even when she wasn't ready yet to see it herself. Tenten tried to flirt with Neji and Hinata still didn't manage to talk to Naruto._

 _So actually all as usual. Somehow._

I was alone at home, because my mother was out bowling with her friends like every saturday and my father could be abroad for his job for several weeks sometimes. I still remember how I had gotten upset over the interruption and had philosophized over who could be ringing the bell now.

The mailman, who would finally deliver my Mangas and new books?  
My old neighbor, who needed some ingredients for her cake again?

I looked down on myself a last time. I was wearing nothing more than my sweatpants, a wide woolen pullover and with that pink socks. With that I was also wearing my nerd glasses, because when I was at home and too lazy to put in my contact lenses and because I hadn't had the nerves to shower that day, I had put up my hair to a messy bun.

I didn't care that that someone would see me in this outfit.

For about two seconds.

Again Sasuke Uchiha's older brother looked down on me and leaned against the door frame with a naturally casual motion. His black, big eyes fixed me in such a crazy way that it calmed me and at the same time made be squirrelly. His expensive perfume climbed up my nose and his tall, athletic figure intimidated me in a very tingly kind of way.

 _Fuck it! There's a model at my door!_ Slowly and slightly shaking, so I reacted in some kind of way to his sudden appearance, I wiped a stray strand of hair off my forehead and put it back behind my ear. I suddenly felt so ugly and scruffy compared to him. So fragile and meaningless. _And at the same time so secure and in a positive way nervous._

I swallowed to get rid of the sudden dry feeling in my throat and too clearly descried the little spots on my cheeks I usually covered with a vanishing creme. Jesus Christ, Sakura! As if he would look like that whenever he hangs out at his house! It echoed in my thoughts and automatically made a few steps to the side. Meanwhile Itachi smirked at me a bit and watched me chew on my lips. I felt so immature and embarrassing.

"Hello, Sakura," he greeted me with his deep and slightly smoky voice and incited a little colony of ants to me, which seemed to crawl around on my back. "Hi!" I gave monosyllabic and deeply inhaled some air, as I noticed a slight stutter in me. "Why are you here? And how do you know where I live?" _Sasuke definitely hasn't told you!_

"My mother still knows where you live. Sasuke mentioned it to her, when you were still together." _Wow, I'm worth mentioning, great!_  
I clenched my fists, as I heard Sasuke's name. "And I'm here, because we're worried about you, Sakura. Or rather mostly my mother is."

"And why doesn't she pay a visit to me then and why do you even care? I mean, I was with him for only half a year and didn't have so much to do with you." Because of being unable to cope, because this situation got to me, I scraped the floor with my feet and only stared at him skeptically and expectantly. What did he want from me?

Itachi didn't show any signs of being hurt by my bitchy behavior. "I understand your anger at my brother," he said quietly, "but centering all theses negative feelings at me and my parents and categorizing the Uchihas as in general heartless and arrogant, doesn't get you anywhere. Because I'm not my brother and my mother, who actually wanted to come by for a long time, neither. Which is the actual answer. She wanted to come by a long time and tends to slightly overreacting in situations like this. That's why I'm here now. To see how you are and to talk to you for a bit. I want to learn something about the person, who used to date my little brother."

Again I felt immature, caught and in a strange kind of way so inexperienced. And his great knowledge of human nature impressed me. "And what do you want to do with me?" Itachi smirked a little, but didn't seem to plan to enter the apartment. "I actually thought we could got to the park. I would drive you home after, because I'm here by car." _He wants to take me with his car, oh God!_

„Uh," I made myself very intelligent again and giggled around shyly, "I'm not really dressed for something like that. I also would have to shower." Itachi seemed to refrain from laughing quietly. "I took the afternoon off. It won't be a problem for me to wait after all." Relaxed he put his hands in his fancy, smoking-like jacket and looked at me amusedly.

"Okay," I whimpered quietly and adjusted my glassed properly on my nose again. "Then… why don't you come in?" Now Itachi was actually laughing, "Because you didn't ask me to come in, Sakura. That would be impolite."

"Oh" Y _es, Sakura. Embarrass yourself even more!_ Desperately and nervous I wiped my wet palms on my sweatpants. "Then… don't bother. You want something to drink while I get ready?"

"A coffee and a glass of water, if you don't mind." Fuck! So damn polite!

"K!" I stammered along with a whimpering voice and winced soon after that, "I mean… no problem, I'd love to."

Forty-five minutes later I desperately and pouty stared at the spread-out chessboard in the park and tried to make any sense of my next move I would have to make at some point.

 _Who had claimed to be good at chess only a few minutes ago? Oh yeah, that was me!_ I groaned desperately and rubbed my forehead, as if I wanted to animate my brain to work harder.

Like it was typical for the small town, it was very warm in summer and the sun began slowly but surely to disappear, just like Itachi's jacket, which he had put in the trunk, as soon as we got into the car. Behind us there were a few kids playing soccer, while a couple in the very back of the park exchanged french kisses. Apart from that I could see some teenagers from my school, who were a few years younger than me, who now enjoyed themselves lying in the grass and staring at their phones. Me myself had mine with me, because I wanted to be available for Ma, but taking it out without a good reason was out of the question. For that I was far too… distracted.

I coughed and tried to pull myself together somehow and not get unnerved by Itachi's attentive gaze. But eventually I managed to put one and one together and move the third chess piece in a row to another square.

"How exactly is our conversation supposed to pass off now, Itachi?" the situation overburdened me. Because _he_ overburdened me. I couldn't and didn't want to understand, why a four years older man wanted to learn something about his brother's ex girlfriend. Why he bothered to, wanted to deal with me, while he surely had a girlfriend, or at least friends he could talk about things with, who were surely way more interesting for him than listening to the babbling of a crybaby, who just now was going through her first heartache.

He surely was busy. With something that was more meaningful than dealing with me. Like studies or something. Itachi did a quick look up at me, before he calmly thought about his next move. _As if he saw me as his opponent, who competed with him on the same level._ I was chewing on my lower lip, like always when I was nervous, couldn't keep my fingers off my hair and with that tried to ignore the tickling feeling in my stomach area.

There was something about him that reminded me of Sasuke in a way. He was a mystery. A mystery I wanted to solve. But different to his little brother he didn't have anything rejecting on him, at least not in the unfriendly kind of way. Much more he was brilliant with friendly reservation and a mature, confident and at the same time so natural appearance, which made me look up to him. Somehow I wanted him to meet me at eye level. But at the same time it was what made it so exciting and thrilling for me. Like with a teacher you wanted to impress in an intellectual and sexual way. Just that he wasn't a professor for me, but only a bit older than me.

"When you talk about Sasuke, because you seek a talk with him and also deserve it," he made his move and looked back directly into my eyes, "I found out what's going on with him, coincidentally of course. I even tried to talk to him about it and he instantly blocked."

Sasuke's problem is identified? I wanted to know what it was, after all I deserved it, didn't I? I made my knuckles crack and looked at him unsurely. I wanted him to tell me. There must have been something. Something I had done wrong from the beginning. I wracked my brains on it for three months and now I just wanted to know. No matter if it could pull me into a deeper hole or would, or if my anger towards him would just intensify even more. I want to know. Now! Again my eyes teared up, I wiped them eagerly, because I didn't want to seem like a little child to him. But at the same time I wanted that Itachi just opened his mouth.

"And, what is it?" _Is it me?_

"Sakura, I see and understand your wish for clarification," in the meantime it was my turn again, but I just couldn't manage to waste only a little thought on something like chess. Was Itachi completely kidding me right now? I… I just wanted to find my damn peace. "But he has to tell you himself. And that's only possible, if he's at peace with himself. Only then he will apologize to you openly and be able to realize his bad actions."

"And what about me? Itachi, I fail to see that I always have to be the one saying please and thank you and showing sympathy." My voice became louder, what made the two seniors next to us smile and start to brag about the libido and the love in teenage years. Didn't they have any other problems?

"He broke my heart! He used me, lied to me and he doesn't care. Give me one reason why especially I should show sympathy for him!" I turned red in the face by anger. If he didn't want to tell me, he could as well just have lied and said he didn't know.

And now he did that to me. With an inner calmness that impressed me, but at the same time drove me nuts. "I said nothing about you having to understand and pity him, Sakura. I just say that, deep down inside, you want to hear the truth from my brother and not from me. With divulging it you would be even more mad at him now and he would never apologize to you. Which is what you actually wish for. It also wouldn't help at all, because you're living through the second phase of separation and Sasuke is running from reality at the moment and would deny everything. You would jump at each other's throats and none of you would be helped."

 _Us two wouldn't be helped! I_ thought tearily and ran my hand through my hair stressed, stared at the chess board with red cheeks for several minutes and tried to no avail to remember my entangled moves. I was so out of it and acted so childish. So childish, while he was near me. With red cheeks I stared at him and moved the chess piece around on the square just like that, because it spontaneously felt most logical to me. "Your knowledge of human nature is damn creepy. What the hell do you study, law? You want to be a lawyer and that's why you analyze people so intensely?"

Itachi smiled at me for the first time in my life. It was one of those smiles that reminded me of the toothpaste commercial, where only the most beautiful models were to play a part. "To be precise I study psychology, Sakura. And I specialize on children and teenagers."

"Oh," I gave very creatively and now felt only more stupid than a few minutes ago. "Cool," I cleared my throat, whereupon his smile transformed to an almost mischievous smirk. "Yes. Yes, that's what annoys my little brother the most about me. I actually am always right about him and he never wants to hear that."

Even when I was extremely angry at Sasuke and could never forgive him for what he had done to me and what I had to go through because of him, I could understand him. At least concerning this point.

|.|.|

 _It seemed illogical how it could be that me and Itachi could really be something like friends, but it really felt like would be during the next three months._

 _Or just on the verge of._

 _Me and Itachi met up at least once every two weeks now. Mostly he was the one suggesting it and I instantly agreed, which didn't suit my friends' plans at all, because it strongly reminded them of the kind of relationship me and Sasuke had had._

 _But it was different with Itachi._

 _Sure, he had barely time to meet up with me in personal, which was because he studied and had other friendships to cultivate, though. But above all he was working in a psychiatric facility for children at the moment and did a lot of trips with the little ones._

 _I knew that, because he contacted me anyway as often as was possible for him. Even when sometimes only by e-mail, because of almost no signal he had to._

 _There had also been the one or the other night, where we talked on the phone and he just asked me how I am, what I had done the whole day and how things were with my image of the future._

 _He was the one advising me to hang out with my friends a lot and not only concentrate on my school achievements, because for my studying I had qualified for going to college already. Even when the tests wouldn't go as planned._

 _And today I was supposed to meet him._

I was excited, when I waited for him impatiently and ran my hand through my hair nervously. As always when I knew that I would meet up with him, I had dressed up a bit more than I actually had to this evening, and so it happened that I was wearing a white dress with red flowers on it, a leather jacket and black shoes with a little higher heels, and leaned back into the seat cushion in the little Italian restaurant, where he had invited me to.

My lips were painted in red. Something I had done for the first time, when Sasuke and I had had our first real date and I had neglected it after our break-up. But I wanted his older brother to classify me as at least average attractive and neat.

"Do you want something to drink, bella?" the waiter with Italian accent asked me, with which he could probably make most women get wet during the first seconds, if he was set out for it. But I wasn't interested in the admittedly handsome man, neither in his flirtatious attempt to cheer me up. "A coke, please," I mumbled and stared at my phone. He was half an hour late and how I knew him, that wasn't his nature at all.

With a sigh I stared out of the window and then beamed by the sight of his black Mercedes he skillfully squeezed into a far too small parking spot, before he walked through the drizzle directly into the restaurant with fast steps. The corners of his mouth went up, when he saw me and directly sat down opposite to me.

"I'm very sorry, Sakura." he instantly began and with that took the menu to read it. My inner alarm was shouting at me and told me that something was far from okay.

 _You look so hurt and sad, Itachi._ Unsettled and not ladylike, I wiped my wet palms at my dress and touched his wrist as soft as possible and tried not to close my eyes delightedly with it, as my body started tingling with that one-sided contact, just like my stomach.

Itachi winced startlingly and put down the menu, for why I could see the shadows under his eyes very good now. He seemingly hadn't been sleeping very much, which could also be told by his messy and not ironed hair. With a closer look I also even noticed his wrongly buttoned shirt.

It didn't seem like him to let himself go like that and come later without a warning, because until now he had always told me, when he was stuck in traffic or looked after Sasuke. Something I didn't like at all, because my ex took all the things Itachi did for him for granted, which however were still not enough. Through all the months I had had regular contact to him, I saw the other side of the coin.

Itachi wasn't just going for success in his career and didn't rub that in his face in front of his parents to gain advantage and it also wasn't true that he only contacted Mikoto and Fugaku, whenever he had achieved something special in college, but whenever he could make time for his family, because he was a very busy and ambitious person. To be precise and to put down Sasuke's former allegation, I could say from personal experience even that Sasuke's parents had wanted to make a trip with Itachi and him and went to an adventure park one week ago. Fugaku had even rented a housing, so his children could forget about their daily stress and just have fun with their family, but Sasuke had stayed with Naruto, when he learned about Itachi coming with them.

"Did something happen?" _great question Haruno. Really!_ I hit my forehead in the inside, because you don't have to study psychology to see that there was something cooking. But on the other hand he was a man and an Uchiha and to ask about it just like that wasn't a good idea with the male individuals of that family.

"I'm behind schedule with a paper, so I forgot time," now a lot more collected than a few minutes ago, he looked straight into my eyes. Liar! I lifted both my eyebrows, like I always do, whenever I don't believe something, and nervously bit my lower lip.

"And why are you behind schedule with that paper?" I dug deeper skeptically and didn't even look at the waiter, when I took the glass wordlessly. _While you always instantly start and glue colored pieces of paper all over your timetable and stick to your work plan squeamishly. You're probably the only person, who works on their papers every day or studies for future tests. So don't hoax me, Uchiha!_

Itachi slightly smiled. "You're knowledge of human nature gets better every time. I understand now, why all my friends and sometimes even family members are annoyed by that. But it's not important, Sakura, and I'm sorry I ditched you. Next time I will pay more attention and try to be punctual again, so please be a treasure and just look for something you like and want to order, okay? It's on me, as an apology." My cheeks turned red by discomposure, as I clenched my fists automatically. I didn't know why, but Itachi's behavior made me really mad. Was it so hard for him to show other people that there were also bad days for him sometimes, or was I just not the right person for conversations like that?

That realization hit me with a little sting in my chest and I noticed my eyes tearing up. After all I liked Itachi and just wanted to help him. So why didn't he say anything? Why wasn't I good enough for something like that again?

"I already know what to order, lasagna," I pushed and folded my arms in front of my chest, which made Itachi sigh. For the first time in his life he seemed to be annoyed by my emotional outbreaks, which only made me be hopping mad even more. "Sakura, there's nothing going on." he tried, which made my eyebrows hurl upwards dangerously fast. " _Nothing_ , Uchiha?" I railed quietly and ignored the weird looks of the other guests. "Of course. There also was nothing going on with Sasuke either, what we could see. My ass, Itachi, and if you believe it or not, I know you pretty good by now and you act so untypical that I simply don't believe it has anything to do with your paper."

 _For the first and until now last time in my life I saw something like anger in his eyes. Anger pointed at me and I just didn't understand what I might have done wrong again._

 _I just wanted him to be honest with me.  
To trust me.  
Had I, in all those months, done anything that made him believe that he couldn't talk to me?_

 _But the worst thing for me was that I had a bad feeling spreading inside me that broke my heart.  
That he only saw me as a young kid, one of his teenage patients.  
That he felt constrained towards his mother and guilty because of his asshole of a brother and for that hung out with me._

 _I just wanted to be more. Even when only a bit._

"Stop always comparing me to my little brother, Sakura. I'm not him. And I never will be." For a bit there was relief spreading inside me. That was his problem he had because of me?

"I'm sorry about that, but you Uchihas are more alike than you want to."  
"I know. It just bothers me a little, since I know you and I can understand my bother much better in that case." The waiter asked pretend cheerfully for our wishes, before we ordered our food and drinks.

"But you have to understand me, Itachi," I tried again and put my hand on his and looked down at the table, as he pulled away, to hide my red cheeks. _Great, Sakura. You want to come across as mature, but act like a thirteen year old girl. You're doing amazing!_

"You really don't look well and I'm just worried about you and I want to know how you are. I don't care about the food right now. I also don't want to talk about my image of my job-related future and job interviews as planned." Nervously I played with my hair and smiled at him as hearty as I could. "I won't talk about it with my friends either, if that's what you're worried about. If you even want to talk to me at all. It would also be okay for me to give the meeting a miss and you talking about it with your friends," _it wouldn't be, but as long as it helped_ , "I just want you to talk about your worries with somebody and to take care of yourself now, Itachi."

 _It got quiet between us. Very quiet. It was that moment, when our entire relationship changed down to its outlines. Now I had made it. I was on the same level with him now and not the little girl anymore, who you hand out wise sayings and advices to._

 _Now I wasn't his little sister anymore.  
Now I was only a little younger woman._

Itachi looked at me really surprised for a long while, with his big, black eyes, before he mumbled something about that he couldn't believe his brother treated a person like me so egoistically, before he said to me that we should go outside for that conversation. He just told the waiter, who only smirked suggestively and probably expected some scene out of any romantic movie, but I didn't care. Not at all.

I only leaned against the cold wall of the restaurant and watched the heavy rain and waited patiently for him to stand next to me.

"I had a little fight with a good friend of mine. His name is Deidara."

"What did he do?" I cautiously demanded to know and enjoyed the soft tickle in my stomach, which had spread out the moment he had leaned against me just like that and for that his arm touched my shoulder. We didn't look at each other and folded our arms in front of our bodies to protect ourselves from the nightly coldness, but the moment still had something very intimate.

"Well. He started a friendship with benefits with one of our mutual buddies and because of that he fell for him. The story between those two would actually be really funny, but they both just don't want to see it. And Deidara asked me to somehow distract him from his heartache. Of course not in a direct way, but I did it anyway."

I shook my head over that revelation and for a moment listened to the rain, which spared us sat least a little bit thanks to the roof above our heads. "That's not the actual problem, I suppose?" Itachi laughed quietly. "No, but it's the beginning of the story. The actual issue of our fight was that he now wants me to stay with him day and night and entertain him. He got mad at me, when I said that I'm falling behind with my studies now and really had to do my homework, because I would get in trouble, and that I want to meet up with other people as well, who want to disburden their hearts to me. To quote his exact words: he called me an unempathic fucker."

I snorted angrily. "That's more like him then." Itachi hummed amusedly. "Careful, Sakura. You weren't so nice in the first months of your break-up either." Offendedly I pouted. "Yeah, but I didn't ask anyone to let themselves get walked all over by me."  
"That's true," he had a giggle over me, I could clearly hear that! Pretend angrily I looked at him and gave him a little push in his rips with my butt, which made him even chuckle. "You know, my actual problem is," he began a bit more serious and I instantly pulled myself together, "I love to help other people and listen to them. But sometimes I don't really feel so great either and most people don't care. They just want me to solve their problems and get mad when I draw back for my own good. That annoys me a little to be honest. Sometimes."

 _When the… 'relationship' between us had started, I had been just impressed by him._

 _By his intelligence, his good behavior, which was thanks to his gentleman character, and his good looks. His presence had been always enjoyed by me and I secretly sought it._

 _Whenever we had been talking, I even just for his pleasant, deep voice liked to listen to him. No matter what he was saying._

 _And of course I asked him what he was doing and if he was all right during our short conversations on the phone and exchanged e-mails. But I had never really dug deeper and in fact noticed a 'fine', but not more than that. I had never really offered him my shoulder to lean onto._

 _To be honest I felt very ashamed at the moment. I wasn't better than Sasuke or that_ _Deidara._

"I'm sorry, Itachi!" I whimpered in shock and jumped at him without any warning to hug him heartily and before I knew it, I buried my face in his chest. "I'm sorry I never asked. I really was an egoistic bitch!" crying, because my emotional nature got the better of me once again, I pulled him closer to me and got as red as a tomato only seconds after that. Itachi didn't do anything against it, although he probably was just too surprised by my actions.

"It's all right," he gave after a little while and wrapped his arms around my body. His voice sounded amused, but because he still didn't bother to pull away from me, I inhaled his wonderful perfume. He smelled like forest honey, pomegranate, rain and Italian food. His heart was beating slowly,calmly. So different to mine. After the waiter knocked on the window with a laugh, I pulled away slowly.

That evening I paid for his food and asked him about his hobbies. It was the evening, when he didn't just got to know me, but I also got to know him. At least a little bit.


End file.
